My Promise

Sometimes, it’s hard to live in the real world. Sometimes, it’s hard to be kind, to be loving, to be here.

Sometimes, I look to her, as she is the 

most beautiful creature that this life has ever seen. I try to be strong for her and I both. But it gets hard.
I live in a world that wants to push me out. I am swamped with the daily task of living. I hurt. I am hurting. I don’t want to believe that it will all be over soon. 

I am beyond that. This life is not always for the universe to decide. God can’t fix me now. 

‘I am a sinner! I repent!’

I cannot say those words again. It is not me. She is me now. I fight for her. I have always fought for her. 

Thank you for entering my life. You are a force stronger than God. For you, you have never failed me. 

I have failed you. But, I will try my hardest to make it up to you. This is a promise.

I stand- feet set apart. Atop the highest roof in the tallest building. 

I scream. I…need help. Help me, please.
And I keep trying to run. So that I can meet you again. And when I lie down, I see him. 

I struggle.

I lose my breath.

I’m torn up inside.

I wait for you to reach  back for me. Will you draw your hand back? 

Help me.
I want you to make me feel like I am no longer lost. Helpme find my way. I need you now more than ever.

Sometimes I sit back and think about how my life has changed. 

I think if the people that have come and gone. I think if the places that I have been able to see in my life. I am never one to regret the decisions that I have made. I have been able to do some incredible activities. When I look to you, all of those events, those people, they all just go away. All I want to accomplish in my life is making you happy. This is my promise to you that I will be better than I was, I will be stronger than I was, I will protect you. I have bevome nothing wothout the thought of you there, looking up to me as you do. 
Are you safe?

Do you need me?

Do you need my help?

I’ll be there.